Can being friends with your ex get you back your relationship?

If you recently had a breakup, you are definitely struggling with the question of whether you should be friends with your ex or not. Here’s my experience, hopefully it may help.

For a long time, I thought being friends with an ex always led to a disaster and cutting off all communication was the only good solution. But when a couple I know got back together because they were friends post their breakup, it made me question the no-contact rule.

When you break up, research has shown you actually have withdrawal symptoms. Your heart aches, and you overthink and do stupid things. Love is indeed a drug. Being friends with an ex can let you handle things better and keep you a little sane. Here are some benefits:

Less painful - The thing that hurts the most post breakups is that you cannot hang out with your partner and share things. But maintaining a friendship allows you to see each other. You can catch up on life updates and avoid the pain of zero contact.

Learning curve - You and your partner broke up for some reason. But do you know where you went wrong and how you could have handled it better? Being friends with them lets you start a conversation about your mistakes. You can choose to work on them and improve yourself.

Moving on - Post-breakup, everyone is a little stuck in their past. The status of your ex does influence your speed of moving on. If you know they have moved on, you accept it and concentrate on yourself. But if not, there is still scope to get back with them.

Friendship remains - Every relationship has friendship as its foundation. You can maintain this bond post your breakup. You do lose on benefits like chilling together, sharing a bed, having sex, and having kids and a family. But the foundation remains.

Reworking your relationship - You can give your relationship a second chance if you are willing to invest more time and effort in this foundation, even if there are no guarantees reunion will happen.

Timeline - Some people never stop talking to each other post their breakup, while some cut each other off for 3 months or more. So don’t expect an exact timeline but go with the flow. Don’t hesitate to text your ex if you wish to.

Final Note: Not all relationships are worth a second chance. Some can be toxic and traumatizing. If you cherish your ex and your bond with them then you should consider staying friends with them, even if it leads nowhere. Otherwise, let it go.