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How to Be Your Own Therapist - a quick summary

Mar 14, 2023 · 2 mins read

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In the bestselling book How to Be Your Own Therapist, psychotherapist Owen O’Kane shares some simple techniques that can be practised daily to form healthier outlooks and banish harmful thinking.


None of these insights will sound new – but they're certainly worth remembering.

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Did you know that your mind is like a garden? You've got to weed out the negative thoughts and water the positive ones. Don't water the weeds, folks. It's really that simple.

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Feeling anxious? Try the "5-4-3-2-1" trick. Name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. Congrats, you've just re-grounded yourself!

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You don't have to be a yogi to meditate. Just sit still, close your eyes, and breathe. This is mindful breathing (not shallow panting like a dog). Again, it's that simple.

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It's okay to cry. In fact, it's healthy. So let those tears flow!


But if truly want to feel content, stop comparing yourself to others. You're not a potato, you're a unicorn. Embrace your uniqueness.

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Don't bottle up your emotions. Share your feelings with a trusted friend or family member.

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Take care of your body. Exercise regularly, eat healthy, and get enough sleep. You're not a vampire. Whether you like it or not, you need sunlight and nutrition.

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Stop catastrophizing. Not every problem is the end of the world. Take a deep breath and put things into perspective. (Unless it's the apocalypse. Then run for your life.)

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Forgiveness is key. Let go of grudges and resentment. It's like a mental detox, but without the green juice.

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Lastly, remember that you're in control of your own happiness. Don't rely on others to make you happy. (Unless it's a puppy, then by all means, rely away.)

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