Infinite games: what they are and why you should play them

I recently discovered an old but brilliant book: Finite And Infinite Games (1986) by American academic James P. Carse. In this Memo, I’ll lay out the meaning of finite & infinite games, their main differences, and why this framework matters.👇👇👇

Finite games are played with the intention to win. All finite games strive towards a conclusion. You can win a finite game, or lose it. Example: Sports.

Infinite games are played with the sole intention to keep playing. Example: Relationships. Infinite players sidestep endings. If the current trajectory points at an end, they change the trajectory.

Finite players eliminate possibility. Infinite players create possibility. In a finite game, you try to eliminate all possibilities except the one where you win. But infinite games are most alive when new possibilities emerge: "He still surprises me - I love that about him."

Finite games can make you ruthless, inauthentic and deceptive. Infinite games make you authentic and open. In a finite game, you act out "the abstract requirements of a role." In an infinite game, you're a concrete person being yourself without driving at a certain conclusion.

Finite games are won with power. Infinite games are played with strength. Power is the ability to bring about the outcomes you want. Strength is the ability to face unpredictable outcomes.

There is no self without the other: “One cannot be human by oneself. There is no selfhood where there is no community. We do not relate to others as the persons we are; we are who we are in relating to others.” James P. Carse

In a finite game you protect boundaries. Examples: In cricket you protect the boundary ropes, in football the goal post. In an infinite game you seek new horizons. A horizon is "simply the point beyond which we cannot see." You never reach horizons, only find new ones.

On storytellers: “Storytellers do not convert their listeners; they do not move them into the territory of a superior truth. Ignoring the issue of truth and falsehood altogether, they offer only vision.”

Bottom line: Finite games could gain you status and glory, but infinite games bring new horizons, strength over power, and deeper relationships.